I've been rereading
Screamfree Parenting, it's a great book for raising children, employees, and having a relationship with a spouse (actually you can get a book for each of those topics). But, I decided I wanted to reread. And I have gotten way more out of it the second time.
Well, on to 25 years from now. The book asks us to reflect on what we think will happen in 25 years. So, here are some thoughts:
Are my children married? Yes. They both are. First one for 8 years. Second on for 3 years.
How would I rate their marriages? Very happy marriage. They are both contentious of their spouse, they help them, they play together, they cook together, clean together. Very kind and loving. Very open. And they NEVER say anything bad, ever about their spouse.
Do they have children? How would I rate them as parents? They are gentle kind loving parents. One has 2 or 3 kids and the other has 1 or 2. They are screamfree, calm, and are there to help and guide their children.
***Okay, before I go on. I see something about this activity. I totally see what I need to do as a parent and wife. I am going to get on that. I hope I can lead by a calm strong example.
Do they have college degrees? Master's degrees? What was their major? What do they do for work? Yes. The oldest has a Ph.D. Smart kid. Major is totally science something. Works as a Ph.D. I'm thinking, a professor or a business executive in the science field. The younger child, has a masters. Artist. Created a successful art business that showcases and sales art pieces. Also teaches others art.
How much money do they make? Do they work for a large corporation? Or do they have an entrepreneurial vision? Hummm. This could go either way. I am thinking the scientific child, may try
Carolina Biological. WOW. That place is amazing. Follow in my brothers footsteps. Not sure though, totally had an entrepreneurial vision as a kid, sold himself singing at a lemonade stand. Hand one customer. Ha, Ha. Thanks Mr. Wardall! Okay, the other. Very entrepreneurial. Very free, and strong. They both make a ton of money, enough to b well off, frugal, and give liberally.
What is the content of their character? Super kind, full of integrity, virtue, abundant, spiritual, trust in the Lord always. Follow the will of the Lord.
What do their spouses and friends say about them? They are amazing hard workers. Determined and dedicated to enhancing their family, business, and always have time to spend on ME. They always make everyone feel like they are most important, just like Grandma Georgia.
How self sufficient are they? What is their decision making process? (Wow, some of these need lots of self-evaluation and thought. How am I doing to help them with these lessons?) They have learned to ask when they need help, to work hard, to finish strong, to do a job well, to make a decision and follow through to the end. To find the rewards because of the hard work and sufficiency they live daily.
How well do they take responsibility for their choices? They are fully responsible. They know consequences come no matter what the choice is. They have learned to take the best route. To give up the
good, better . . .
Are they physically healthy and active? how well do they take care of their bodies? They are very physical. They love to eat whole foods such as fruits, vegetables and whole grains. They love to exercise and do activities such as skiing, boating, running, biking, building, weight lifting, because it was always a part of their life.
What are my grown children's deepest values? How do they contribute to society? My children know they are children of God. They know this from
living the gospel. They know who he is, who they are, and they work hard at being strong members of society as it relates to their foundation in the gospel. They know that this life is a time to prepare to meet God.
How do they carry themselves around others? They understand that everyone has differences and that it is okay. They love all. They are kind and patient with all. They forgive their enemies and love their friends and family. They do not push themselves, their beliefs or anything else on others. They just love.
How do they spend their time alone? Everyone needs to recharge their batteries. They spend their time alone in reflection. Whether they are trying to draw closer to the Lord or they are developing their talents. They see the connections to who they are, their gifts from God, and what they can become. Always achieving. Even if it is in reflective meditation, or quiet observation. They are finding peace.
What are their spiritual beliefs, and how do those beliefs shape their worldview? They know who created the earth, that he talks to a Prophet today, they know the messages are true, because they live them. And to know the truth, they pray. They believe in personal revelation. It has blessed their life much. They know that the Prophet guides a worldwide church. They know that families can be together forever. They love to attend the temple.
***WOWSERS. I got lots of changes to make, so that I can be an example. That I can continually teach them all that they need to know. Now, some personal questions about myself.
Am I married? How would I rate my marriage? Yes, I am. I have been married for almost 40 years. It is an incredible marriage. It was build on trust early on. And then we learned to work together, to unite as a team and to be a help to one another.
How healthy am I? How well do I take care of myself? I am super healthy. I run at least 4 13.1 miles (Half Marathons) a year. One a quarter. I lift weights. I am active. We play always. We run, hike, bike, ski, boat, etc. We love to play and it shows. :) I eat the best foods that fuel my body.
Where do we live? Am I still working? Have I retired? How do I spend my days? I live in the house we built. I am retired. I am painting and drawing. I am writing for fun. I spend my days in study, in creativity, in playing and teaching my children's children. I help them always. I love them. I work with my spouse on projects. We have served a mission and plan to serve many more.
How have I grown and matured? I have learned how to guide. To be there for others. Not to be there for others. I have learned to be strong. To know that I can accomplish much with great goals and a desire. I have learned not to be selfish, to think of others first. To love first and not worry. To know that whatever will be will be. . . .
How often do I see my grown children? What type of relationship do I have with them? Am I close? Distant? At each others throats? We have a very positive relationship. I am there to help as needed.
I am there to lend support as needed. I am supportive to their decisions. I do not question them. I know as adults they are capable of making them. I pray for them. I never demand from them. My life is in order and not a problem for them.
How much respect do I have with my children? As individual grown ups? Or do I still want them to grow up? My children are amazingly strong. They are so advanced. So grown up. I long to have known as much as they do. We exchange advice to one another - so that I may learn. I enjoy them and respect them immensely.
Do I still support them financially? Do they still live under my roof? Do I live under theirs? Nope. Nope. and Nope. I will encourage them to send us to assisted living as we need it. I have watched grandparents and such say no. I need to be home. But, I will save enough money that we can take care of ourselves. Our children have learned that to get things, they have to make money, they have to make decisions, they have to pay consequences. I am optimistic that they will be financially secure. I am optimistic that they were able to be debt free, just like we will be and that they will have that stress removed from their lives. Of course, if they need anything and we can lend help as needed we will be certain to do that.
How would I rate myself as a grandparent? Nothing but AMAZING! I will be fun. I will be creative and I will be patient. I will love every moment I have, for those are the most important moments EVER!
Are my children inspired by me? My success and my maturity? How do they talk about me to their spouses, friends and children? They never speak ill. Because I never spoke ill. They admire me, and I admire them. We inspire each other. We provide fun, spiritual, delicious activities and events. And we are an amazing family.
OKAY, OKAY. I know, I sound big headed. BUT, what if this could all come true? It can. I can stop being demanding, and mean, and crazy. I can love my life. I can live my life. And I can enjoy my life. And, I intend to do just that.
